AGE DEFIANT

Penny Preville 18K, moonstone and diamond earrings

There it was in my email in box again. The same press release I received a couple of months ago with a headline touting “Anti-Aging” jewelry.

I may be a pushover for jewelry with a message or meaning, gems with symbolism and I am just superstitious enough to wear a neck-full of charms when I fly to ensure that the plane land safely (and I do believe it is the talisman given to me by friends and family rather than trained pilots and high-tech control towers that allows my feet to touch the ground). I have been known to wear amulets to ward off evil and bring good luck. I sleep with a rose quartz under my pillow for love, wear a lotus leaf for new beginnings– and being single– every time I see a full moon, I think about taking off a moonstone earringand putting it in my mouth “to bring my lover to me” (wherever or whoever he might be).

But there is no way, I am buying into the marketing strategy of jewelry that helps with anti-aging. Sorry.I just can’t imagine any piece of gold or silver is going to smooth out the furrows deepening on my forehead and you are not going to get me to believe in pendants or bracelets to get rid of  those crepe paper like creases around my eyes. I’ve put my trust in the more brilliantly packaged age-defying creams and serums. Bottles of which have now spread to fill up my shelves in my small NYC bathroom but have not filled in my frown and laugh lines.

It took me around five years longer than the average person to think of Botox as anything but the same “formula” that came in dented soup and vegetable cans that I was told to look out for every time I had to feed my brothers when I was young. Shooting botulism into ones head seemed as appealing as mistaking Mr. Clean for lemonade.

But I was finally able to come to terms with the syringes that would raise my friends eye brows and freeze their frown lines as a medical miracles, just as I have marveled at how other fillers and injectables help retain a youthful, if not Barbie-like appearance every time I turn on an awards show. Figuring out who had what done has become as much of a sport for me as betting on the jewelry being worn in the red carpet.

I am also a devout believer in the power of strength resistance training. Toning your biceps goes a long way in gaining confidence that it’s your bracelets jangling rather than your upper arms. Unlike the press release (I have just re-read) will have me believe– it’s not the other way around–in no way are my bracelets firming my arms.

Nor will necklaces or layered pendants bring back the once swan like neck that overnight seemed to have transformed into chicken skin.

Jewelry, while magical, just does not have that particular power.

Creams, lotions, potions and oils with water from the Adriatic sea and natural floral concoctions–maybe?–or at least the texture of which could make you feel and think you are smoother as you slather it on.

But when I receive a press release that basically tells me a company

has created a line of anti-aging amulet jewelry “to make you feel young without the costly creams or injections.” I really have to question how an Evil Eye bracelet and Hamsa hand pendant can help you retain the texture of your skin around your eyes when you are wearing them on your wrist and neck?

My suggestion for this company is to go back and talk about  what these amulets were originally used which was protection from bad luck. This I might fall for and invest in–just  like my “in flight” charms, rose quartz and moonstones  and this new facial mask my friend just sent me from Japan.

But please leave the “anti-aging” marketing to the beauty experts and dermatologists — I want a potion for my wrinkles and something that sparkles for my superstitions.